When someone has lived inside your mind for your entire adult life, are you ever able to really free yourself from them? What if you don't want the presence gone? Is it worth having it pop up every time you hear that one song, catch a snippet of that movie on cable, smell that perfume or incense that was an integral part of your life? What happens when everything is suddenly so intense that you want to cry, but can't? It can't be healthy to have such a powerful longing inhabit your brain for so long. But no matter how close I get, the tears never actually come. that can't be good. 

in vino veritas

Collective Soul and Irish whiskey

 I didn't think this still existed. Apparently whatever I posted here like 15 years ago is gone. That's fine. It doesn't matter. I'm listening to music and feeling maudlin. What else is new? Whiskey and music bring things to the surface. A tune or lyric hits like a fist, crushing my chest with wistfulness for a particular moment lost in the past. Perfect little moments when everything was right and I was happy. Always fleeting. Happiness comes in fits and spurts. It isn't continuous. The longer I go on and the bleaker now gets, the less happy or fulfilled or hopeful I am, the harder the past contentments hit. Sudden knowledge that the happiness was almost 30 years ago. The knife twists in my heart. Sudden panic. That can't be right. Three of my five decades ago. That can't be right. It's been 20 years since I felt whole. It's been 30 years since I felt right. Fifty percent of my life living in self-loathing depression. 

Realizing that the things I say could be hurtful and second-guessing everything I think and say. I can't really speak my mind any more. I'm too worried it will sound harsh or cruel. never the intent, but realizing perceptions are different makes it hard to do things right. Eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and being suddenly painfully aware that people don't know what I mean, so everything must be overexplained and couched in tact and diplomacy. Unable to be angry because what if I'm in the wrong. There's no way to articulate anything that doesn't end up sounding selfish. But everyone is selfish in their way. Everyone wants to think they're the good one, but is anyone ever really good?

Driving to canada with a carful of friends, this album playing on the tape deck, no passports or enhanced licenses, just four people who want to drink some Molson draught from quart mason jars and crash out at a motel, drive around and see the sights, have some Nanaimo bars, drink brandy and smoke our Marbs and some cheap vending-machine Cuban cigars. No worries, no cares; we have enough money for food and gas and a cheap place to sleep. Who needs more? Music and laughing and freedom.  There's no way to reclaim that without giving up everything you've accumulated in the last 27 years, but you can't do that because those are the things that define you, that you sold your life in exchange for a salary to afford to get, and giving them up would be admitting you gave up 40,000 hours of your life for a few rooms full of junk and that nothing can be as good as it was when you were 21 and had nothing but freedom, but in the end isn't freedom all there is? Is there anything as good as living unfettered and free? The price of complacency is 40 hours of your life a week for as long as you're able to toil. How is freedom even more costly than that? Freedom only costs things. Comfort. But if you're beholden to a timeclock and a boss and all the things you bought with the pieces of your life you sold off to your job, can you ever be free? Happy? Truly content? 

The Art of Blake Island.

Each one of us has an inner nerd. I think we do. If you have any interest in anything in life there is a part of that that you love and have certain knowledge of and just nerd out on. Mine is art and art history. I'm not an expert by any means but I remember learning about art of the Native Americans in the Pacific Northwest. Art and art history. The sad part is I don't remember specifics but I kept my text book from that class and will look up the stuff I want to remember. I remember there is significance to certain shapes and colors used in the art but beyond that I don't remember. 

Blake Island, aka Tillicum Village, a very popular tourist spot that offers a glimpse into Native American culture. Now I realize that a lot of it could be played up for the tourist, but hopefully what is showcased is accurate. I would hope that it might spark more than just a passing interest for someone. I love the art I've seen there. I love the colors and subject matter as well as how it's executed, e.g. carving, painting, metal work, etc. I find it interesting because this art style has been passed down over many, many, many generations and it stays true to its origins. The medium and media of the art might change but it's still quite distinctive as being from this area. 

Photo assignments!

I love photography and if I had any sense in my head I'd figure out a way to make money from it. I think I'd have to stumble upon a buyer for anything to work. I've been trying to come up with interesting ideas for photos but my brain is currently on pause. In lieu of my brain I tried getting help from my friends and the internet. So far this is what I've found on the internet that seems interesting. A friend suggested fractals another friend suggested doing some sort of fire and water thing and using a computer to digitally meld them. 

I think some or most of them will be done simultaneously. I will start posting things as soon as I figure out the camera situation and what the heck I'm taking pictures of. 

Some of these, right off the bat I'd want to avoid, like taking pictures of a meal a day for a month. Sounds like it could get boring fast. Unless I do something to make it interesting! 

15 Creative Photography Projects to get you Shooting. 

You have all undoubtedly heard of the 365 project.  The project encourages photographers to get out and take one picture every single day, and then to post that photo online.  It is a fantastic way to improve your shooting skills; HOWEVER, I have seen so many 365 projects lately that I am beginning to wonder whether so many photographers are doing it because they want to improve their skills, or whether they are all doing it simply because they haven’t discovered the unlimited number of creative photo projects that can be done.

I created this compilation of photography projects to help inspire you to get shooting.

Photography Project #1: Highlights of your life. Re-create significant moments from your life and shoot them in a series: that time Jimmy Johnso next door gave you a black eye, hiking to a lighthouse with your father, going off to college, getting baptized, etc.  Even cooler if you have your kids step in as the actors.

Photography Project #2: One landscape. Find one location where you enjoy shooting landscapes, and then visit the location about 10 times over the course of a month.  Photograph the same location in different weather conditions, different light, and using your new creative ideas each time you go.

Photography Project #3: Homelessness. Thomas Hawk is a photographer who does a $2 homeless photo project.  Whenever a poor person asks him for money, he pays them $2 to pose for a photo.  Then the person will have earned the money by working for a few minutes while the photographer shoots, and he gets great photos of interesting people.  I really hate business cliches, so I’m not sure if I should call this a win-win, or synergy.  Either way, it’s a fantastic project.

Photography Project #4: Fairy tales. Take classic stories such as Little Red Riding Hood or other folk tales and take photos to illustrate the story.

Photography Project #5: Geophoto. Do a project to shoot the geocaching locations around your city.  I guarantee you’ll find fantastic new locations.  If you’re new to this idea,check out this post where I explained how it works.

Photography Project #6: Self Portraits. Take one self-portrait each day that shows your emotions and happenings of that day.  If you do this one, please keep yourself fully clothed.  There are quite a few well-known female photographers on Flickr who seem to think we want to see you naked or half naked.

Photography Project #7: Your city’s architecture. Go shoot the beautiful buildings around your city at all different times of the day.  I bet you’ll find some interesting buildings that you’d never noticed before.

Photography Project #8: Your meals. Take a picture of one meal a day for a month.  Not only is this a convenient way to count calories, you can really learn lighting by learning food photography.

Photography Project #9: Food fight. No, I don’t mean throwing food.  I mean to let your imagination run a little wild.  Imagine little stories with the food in your refrigerator and shoot photos to illustrate the tales.

Photography Project #10: Downtown fashions.  Do street photography of the most interestingly dressed people in the downtown area of your city.  No matter where you live, you’ll find more interesting people than you might expect.  Spend several nights downtown and you’re guaranteed to get some fantastic shots.

Photography Project #11: A day in the life. Find someone you find interesting and shoot their whole day.  Alternatively, you could do a day in the life of a group of people.  For example, you could do A Day in the Life of Brigham Young University students.  If you were doing this project, you could take pictures all over campus at different hours of one day and show all the interesting things that happen there.

Photography Project #12: Photojournalism. I loved working for a short time as a photojournalist.  Where will you find the news?  If you live in the United States, you can download a free app for your smartphone that gives you access to the police radio channels.  That will help to find interesting things!  Just make sure you do it legally…

Photography Project #13: Social Issues. Find a social issue that is important to you and take photos to highlight the struggle.  For example, you could do a photo project about teen obesity, the elderly, immigrant farm workers, etc.

Photography Essay Idea #14:  Working hard. Think of a few interesting professions around your home and take an environmental portrait of many people while at work.  You might recall my photo shoot of a cab driver last month as an example.

Photo Essay Idea  # 15:  The middle of the day.  I see too many photographers using “I can’t shoot because it’s the middle of the day” as an excuse.  You can make terrific photos during the day if you learn to do it right.  Go shoot during your noon lunch hour for a month and you’ll learn how to do it.  I did this last summer every day on my lunch break and I captured a some beautiful shots.

http://improvephotography.com/881/15-creative-photography-projects-to-get-you-shooting/